SCRIBES SAY BOFFO BOFFO IF HOMELESS PEOPLE COULD FLY MUSICAL FOCUSES ON THE PLIGHT OF THE ROOFLESS
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From the extreme off-Broadway musical IF HOMELESS PEOPLE
COULD FLY, comes the opening number performed by Homeless Harry & The Hash
Pipes back from their tour of Amsterdam. They played every hash house in
Holland. Once again, the poignant play about the plight of homeless America
only amplifies the message that their problems are now ignored by arguments of
debt and percentages of income taxes. Hey, the homeless are driven by debt, and
it never needs an oil change.
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With much of the inter-web protesting SOPA, the government's attempt to control deserts at the Mexican restaurants run by illegal immigrants, WHACKO-TV was indeed taken over by an ALIEN from another planet. Total Commander Nimrod comes down here with his carpet bag full of SPACE logic and tries to lecture America like a slime-covered Newt from another planet. He is in fact from another planet where all the ET-types wear Dayglo-green toilet seats. Get a number, take a seat.
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So far the Presidential Primary season has been filled with
excitement. Well that is, if you like vile opinions, vitriolic speeches and vacuous
statements. WHACKO-TV put the full force of its news team on duty for New
Hampshire. INSURRECTION TWENTY TWELVE, as we call it, is a bent look at
straight men trying to win the nomination of the Republican Party. We spared no
expense and were not underwritten by any Super PAC; that we know of? We are on
our way to South Carolina now for some low country barbeque. Until then, enjoy
the recap.
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COOKIN' WITH DA WHITE GUY IS BACK
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Finally we get Chef Dwight back from all the food networks
and world tours to bring us another episode of Cookin’ with DaWhite Guy. This
time our live-in chef creates a wonderful Indian dish that will release major
endorphins. You remember Major Endorphins who starred in the great military
Bollywood classic “To Curry Favor”. Alongside Betty Davis, this was a movie
that inspired the dish that Chef Dwight cooks for us tonight.
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2011 THROUGH THE EYES OF A FILM MAKER
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Before we close the WHACKO-TV studios and head on out for
that big New Year’s Eve party, we let some of the college interns put together
a little tribute to 2011. Being of a noir nature and attempting to use a
drained lake as the metaphor for the close of a tough year, they presented this
to our staff. We thought it was a bit much, but we were impressed they shot it
on film at 24 frames a second, which is more retro than video. Who paid for the
damn film? We just wanted to wish everyone in the viewing audience a HAPPY NEW
YEAR; onward to better things in 2012.
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HOW CLOSE CAN YOU GET TO THEM?
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At the end of every year we evaluate all our relationships.
And in this case, our videographer and self-proclaimed folk singer Lumber Jack
Bob is asking the question: How close can you get to a wild turkey? It seems to
us that this is a story about a family out for a snack in the field. When Jack
Bob tries to get close to them, they want nothing of it. We want all our
viewers to know that no turkey was harmed in the making of this video. Well,
except that one at Christmas dinner.
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HEY WE JUST LOVE THE SONG
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It was quite a year. From taking down the top terrorist to
goofy presidential candidates, we got through another one. The WHACKO-TV Best
of 2011 covers all the “talented” people who have contributed to the wonderful
programming that we have provided to the world. We are so excited about
escaping from this year and getting to 2012. So, Happy New Year and enjoy the
12-13 minutes you will never get back after watching our presentation.
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NEWSPAPER READER SPEAKS OUT OF HIS MOUTH
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Everyone is talking about the protester; winner of the man
of the year in Time Magazine. But few people acknowledge the home protester.
That older person, who sits on their sofa, reads the paper and talks out loud
about what bothers them in the US of A. The Last Newspaper Reader is back and
this time, he reads and talks. A perfectly wonderful freedom we all can enjoy.
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Once again the WHACKO-TV game department has renewed the
contract for one of our best game shows SLAP THE MONKEY. Catch the antics of
CECIL RATHBONE our host and the unusual guests: Presidential hopeful Hal
Hitler, federal prisoner Rufus T and the ever outrageous Bobby Ganoosh. See it
now and play along at home.
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You Say You Want a Revolution!
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With all the activity in Egypt these days we are reminded of
the lyrics of that famous song, “here comes the new boss, same as the old boss.”
Ironically, this was the same day Bruce Springsteen announced his next concert
tour, but we were talking about the oppression of an entire nation. It is always something; from the dictator, to
the dictator’s son, to the overly zealous military leader, Egypt has it all.
Boy, I hope those pyramids last long enough for democracy to kick in. WHACKO-TV
cannot believe that this local merchant is taking advantage of this new
uprising, but hey, democracy loves capitalism.
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OCCUPY MIAMI BEACH CHOSEN BEST PROTEST SITE IN AMERICA
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We shall overcome these tough times. We can only hope that
one day we can all look back on all this and it will seem funny. Wolf Douglas
and BACKLINE are back with a look at the OCCUPY WALL STREET movement in New
York and the recent Police crackdown. If cleanliness is next to godliness, then
the Occupy Movement is a bit cleaner after Mayor Moneybags evicted the protesters
from the park they have occupied for the last two months. WHACKO-TV has cleaned
up its act, too.
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BEANS BEANS THE MUSICAL FRUIT
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It is so warm and wonderful to see brothers working together
on a video like this. Dwight, Dewayne and Wolf Douglas teamed up for the first
time to talk about their new health plan. Everyone seems to have one. This is
better than Obama-care and won’t turn your face orange like John Boehner’s.
Join the party as we present this new music video from those three crazy
knuckleheads.
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America is a country where litigation seems to be our middle
name. We hate attorneys, but we tend to call them when we want to get our pound
of flesh. We love to sue people. One of the more progressive attorneys is Tony
Facovia from the law firm of Wright, Wong & Facovia. We covered his most
recent speech at Guy Phister University to the 2014 graduating Law Class. What
can we say about Tony that hasn’t been said at the bar? And we mean the bar he
goes to after work each day.
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OCCUPY MOVEMENT SLOWING BURNING OUT
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There comes a time when we all feel like we heard enough.
There is nothing more frustrating than to believe someone else is using your
ideas. WHACKO-TV rarely airs out its dirty laundry, or takes out someone else’s
trash, but the staff and management is very aggravated about celebrities
stealing some of our material to use for their own. That is why Wolf Douglas
has taken to the air to expose these people.
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